Once October happened, I fell off the face of the Earth. I am now making my way back into society. October was a horrible month. Once October happened my world went crashing. I mean just one October episode affected everything. This one episode made me realize how unhappy I was, specifically at my job, and I really needed to bounce. As we move out of November I still hate my job but time heals all wounds. I’m crawling back on the scene and I have set up some professional goals so I can bounce ASAP.
I am also starting a fashion blog and will try to launch that website in the New Year.
Thirty is really starting to settle in now – I’m a bit nervous. This journey to 30 has been like a breakup. I have felt every emotion known to man within these past 5 months. Right now, I’m trying to let it go and let God. I know that I am not in control so I am learning to just do my little part and let God do His.
Looking for a job sucks! I hate interviews because I always leave so insecure about myself and my talents. I always leave thinking about the what ifs?
What if I don’t do good? What if I don’t understand? What if this, what if that?
I have to then sit alone with my thoughts and give myself the biggest pep talk ever. I talk myself into believing that I can do it – and I know that I can, I just have to own it.
Every time I get a new court date for my clients I tell myself that I won’t be there to handle their case. In my mind I am preparing to leave and I believe that I will get another job very soon. But in the meantime, I am putting aside my differences with my job and giving my clients my 110%.